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Reflecting on This Year and Embracing the Next

Reflecting on This Year and Embracing the Next

As I reflect on the closing chapter of the year before stepping into the new one, I find it helpful to contemplate these two questions: Firstly, what is the challenge that I handled well in the past year? And then, what fueled my ability to do so? Perhaps, for you, it was letting go of needing others to feel good about you in order to feel good about yourself. The fuel that enabled you to develop this capacity may have been surrounding yourself with people who accept you for who you are and...

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Relational Nutrients for Our Most Unlovable Parts

Relational Nutrients for Our Most Unlovable Parts

Relational Nutrients in our deepest places are the key to thriving. I just returned from co-leading a workshop on this topic in Southern California, and thought I would share it with you! In Psalm 139:23-24, we encounter a powerful and transformative message that carries a profound truth: "Search me, O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting!" This is an invitation to be seen, not through the lens of...

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Growing Strong Through Attachment, Boundaries, Integration, and Mutuality

Growing Strong Through Attachment, Boundaries, Integration, and Mutuality

Over the last few writings, I have been talking about the developmental tasks we all accomplish as we grow from infants into adults. (You may read them here) These four components of development - Attachment, Boundaries, Integration, Mutuality - essentially support us throughout life just like the trunk of a tree holds up the branches, produces fruit and keeps it from tipping over when storms come. If we are underdeveloped in any of these four areas, it will show up. We will have limited...

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Character Structure of a Tree: A Framework That Can Help Us Nurture Growth

Character Structure of a Tree: A Framework That Can Help Us Nurture Growth

Hello, Fellow Journeyer! Last time, we discussed the power of internalization and how our lens shapes our experiences. Today, we'll take a closer look at how our character structure develops using the tree as a metaphor. It will give us a framework that can help us understand ourselves and others better. Let's dive in! The Significance of the Trunk: Imagine a tree standing tall and weathering life's storms. The trunk serves as its foundation, providing support, nourishment, and protection. In...

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Understanding Our Lens: The Power of Internalization and Our Stories

Understanding Our Lens: The Power of Internalization and Our Stories

Hey there, friends! Grab your favorite cup of coffee or tea, and let's dive into a topic that shapes the way we perceive ourselves and the world around us. Today, we're going to talk about internalization and how our unique lens colors our experiences. So, let's get started! First things first, I'll share a bit about myself. My name is Tina, and I'm the youngest of two sisters. I come from a family where I experienced the challenges of having a depressed and borderline mom. Chaos of abuse...

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The Power of Structure: Moving from Wishes to Goals

The Power of Structure: Moving from Wishes to Goals

April’s Group Coaching session was focused on the importance of creating Structure. Today I will share a bit of how structure is key to growth in any area. Before each member joins one of my Coaching Groups, I work with them as they create their stretch goals. A stretch goal is an ambitious target that requires a good amount of growth, learning and effort beyond their current capabilities to get there. Each person begins the year with three stretch goals. One personal, one relational and one...

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